Goddess gave me a pass on blogging the week before last, but that's long since used up. Get back to work!
As I first sat down to write this, the radio was playing Foreigner's "Feels Like The First Time." Aside from being a pretty good Jukebox story, the song somewhat topical, because as I sort through memories of trance, I keep coming back to one of my earlier ones, which isn't so much sexy as it was life-changing.
When I first met Her, I was in university. Pretty soon most of my spending money was going into calling Her -- no, I wasn't paying Her, the long distance plan on the campus dormitory phone service just sucked that bad. You'd think that given how much we paid to live there... luckily, VoIP clients were starting to come into their own at the time. Anyhow, I wasn't Hers right away, we didn't even do trance play at all until we'd been talking for a couple of weeks.
When I first started playing with trance, I'd get to feeling puffy and bloated... but not in a negative way, if that makes any sense. I think it was about being more aware of what my body was doing in the moment, and more signal must mean there's more body. Or something. It took a while to realize that the fact I don't feel that anymore doesn't mean I'm not going as deep into trance, it means I'm getting more accustomed to how I feel when I'm in trance.
What was I talking about? Right. Trance memories. So after a while She offered to make me Hers and after some careful consideration I accepted. And early on, She planted a suggestion to, now and again, as long as it wasn't distracting, be particularly aware of the fact that I was Hers and feel good about that.
And there I was sitting up in the back row of a half-empty lecture amphiteatre, dutifully jotting down notes from the overhead projector when I suddenly realized I didn't need to be writing down this particular material because I knew it already. I could give my tired brain and wrist a break until we moved on to something I didn't know.
And I was Hers. And it was good to be Hers. And there was a little squirming in the chair, and that was okay because I was just another faceless student taking notes and nobody was paying attention. And everything felt GOOD. And I sat there and daydreamed that I was back in my dorm room passively listening to Her voice in the headset, and She was telling me to imagine that I was with Her in person (which wouldn't actually happen for another six months or so) and there was holding skin-on-skin...
Until I picked up on cues that the prof was wrapping up the lecture. Then, BAM, focused again taking notes on reading and homework, because focusing when I needed to focus was also part of Her commands (something I've let slip in the years since!).
Then I went to the computer lab and wrote Her an email (on an eMac!), which is something I did on a fairly frequent basis back then. :)
If I remember right, I got a 'B' in that course, too.
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