Firstly, apologies to my Lady and our readers for being late. My computer has been mostly dead, and I honestly dread typing a blog post on my iPod with a dread that is hard to put into words. It is on it's way to being fully reawakened, but it's not quite there yet.

I feel like I let Her down by not posting on time for last week. That is not a happy feeling to me. In addition to not wanting to let Her down simply because that is not cool, there is a part of me that gets honestly scared when I do. It's a long story as to why, and my story is one that doesn't need to be rehashed here. If you really want to know, pop over to my blog and comment and I'll post about it. 

Suffice to say that I constantly watch for signs that things are going south, so I can prepare emotionally and in other ways. That has served me well in the past, and kept me from being homeless on one major occasion. It is genuinely hard for me to believe that, since She has accepted me into Her life and family, I will be a part of it until either I commit some kind of horrid infraction or life circumstances change in rather drastic ways where no one is really to blame. (Neither of which I plan on, mind you. I just think that way, until She sees fit and has the time and energy to program me a different way. Sometimes factory default settings kind of suck, ya know?)

It's nothing on Her part, and, in fact, She frequently goes out of Her way to assure me that She is keeping me and I'm not going anywhere, but it's hard to convince a heart and mind that have had that level of betrayal in the past. I have no idea why She has given me Her love and trust the way She has. I'm just honored and blessed to have it and I hope I continue to prove worthy of it in Her eyes.